Sunday, 26 July 2015

Skin Dossier I: The Current State of Affairs

Eight months ago, I delved into the colossal world of skincare. I was confused, alone, experimental and, most importantly, I had no idea what I was doing. Today, not a single sentiment of that has changed. While I do now have experience - I understand my skin better, I can recognise ingredients that do and don't work for me, I finally get the deal with face masks - there is still so much to learn.

Like me, I suppose the majority of us can be fairly self-deprecating, but in terms of physical appearance, this can often be a little over-critical than modest. 

I have never been comfortable in my skin.

There, I said it. While this is a statement a lot of us can relate to, varied by our own measure of self-worth, it's a very difficult fact to come to terms with. I can't fix, change, or transpose my skin. While I can improve it, it will never measure up to the flawless idealogical standards I give to skin.

This means I need to get comfortable. I need to get real.

As I'm sure we've all seen by now, Em, My Pale Skin released her YOU LOOK DISGUSTING film to highlight how the pressure of social media reinforces unattainable idealogical standards, the degradation of self-worth and the sickening bile that spews from troll culture. But she is a real person, with real skin and she has the confidence to show who she really is.

While my skin has improved dramatically over the past eight months - primarily because I now actually wash it - it is still far from this thing we like to call perfect. My pores are still dark and large, my t-zone is still overwhelmingly oily, I still get blemishes and inflammation, I have scars and marks and lesions. But so what? That's just my face. It does the job of being a face. But it's taking its toll on my confidence. But so what? Because I am measuring myself to a standard of skin that's faked.

I think its important to document my journey through skincare, and the most effective way of doing this is showing you my skin. This is a very tough thing to do, to expose myself in this way. The real me. But if we don't make a movement against unrealistic expectations of men and women, who will?

These are perhaps the most un-gratuitous pictures of myself. These photographs are uploaded at full resolution (5184 x 3456), please click them for higher quality. There are no filters or photo-manipulation. I am wearing no make-up, just Trilogy Certified Organic Rosehip Oil. I am lit only by the natural light from my window.

It is an important step for me to document how my skin changes - if it changes - but it is also important for me to get comfortable with this skin.

This is my skin. 

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